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When I first heard about Twitter, I responded like a geriatric germaphobe walking by an amusement-park portapotty: “I think I know what those kids are doing in there, and I want no part in it.”
But, eventually, I went over to the dark side. I signed up for Twitter. And I was shocked by how much I loved it.
It is a blank slate for whatever you want it to be. News—check. Hot takes—check. Ferrets—probably. If you really were interested, I bet there’s a subculture providing hot takes on ferret news.
Twitter’s trail-running subculture is less obscure but no less delightful. It’s a mix of fun personalities and interesting perspectives that can be brilliant, infuriating, sublime and everything in between. Twitter is a place where you can engage with the sport’s best, learn some things and—most importantly—have a few chuckles.
So where do you start? Here are nine trail runners bringing the funny on Twitter.
1. Amelia Boone (@ameliaboone)
Spartan Race World Champion and Western States 100 Golden Ticket winner; attorney
So this morning I’m just going to run east and then walk back home. Eastbound Strava segments, here I come! 😆 pic.twitter.com/C4UHPuxdO9
— Amelia Boone (@ameliaboone) April 5, 2022
Amelia mixes humor with honesty in a way that is sure to make you think about what makes you tick, as a runner and as a person.
Also, she will keep you up-to-date on all Pop Tart-related news.
2. Corrine Malcolm (@corrinemalcolm)
National 50-mile trail champ; self proclaimed “retired graduate student”
Corrine brings you a daily dose of epic, whether it be through running (her hobby) or donut-eating (her passion). She lets you follow her journey from unknown to one of the best trail runners in the world, one tweet at a time.
3. Eric Schranz (@UltraRunnerPod)
Ultrarunner; podcaster; beer commentator
Eric is what the sport needs more of—an objective commentator and participant who takes it seriously, but not too seriously. He specializes in news and podcasts, but throws in wonderfully biting commentary and beer advice.
From my experience and duly aware of the generalizations, but:
Track parents are better than XC parents are better than soccer parents are better than swim parents are better than baseball parents are better than basketball parents.
— Ultrarunnerpodcast (@UltraRunnerPod) April 9, 2022
4. Megan Roche (@Meg_Runs_Happy)
Four-time national trail champion (50K twice, 10K, 30K); medical student; author’s better half
Megan has an awesome dog (you’ll get photos and captions in a puppy voice) and a mediocre husband (but she doesn’t let that hold her back). Expect great jokes and even better sunrise photos.
Super Diva Fridays in honor of RBG.
“If I had any talent in the world … I would be a great diva.” pic.twitter.com/Ez6x4g1FAT
— Megan Roche (@Meg_Runs_Happy) November 20, 2020
5. Tim Tollefson (@TimTollefson)
Third at UTMB 2016 and national 50K trail champion; physical therapist
Do you like mountains? Do you like running? Then follow Tim for a reminder that there is always the option to move to Mammoth Lakes, California, if your current life plan doesn’t work out.
6. Alex Varner (@afvarner)
National 50K trail champion and Lake Sonoma 50 winner; investment manager
Alex’s Twitter feed is what brought the trail world the term “squishy” to describe the optimum body composition before an ultramarathon. Follow Alex for the squish and other gems of wisdom.
Anybody else doubt themselves buying the 2lbs of assorted sliced cheese at Costco (assuming you won't be able to finish it before it turns) and then it's gone in 5 days?
No? Ok… I'll be over here in the corner.
— afvarner (@afvarner) March 28, 2021
7. Jenn Shelton (@SheltonJenn)
Life adventurer; Trail Runner contributing editor
There is no succinct way to describe Jenn. So I’ll just keep it simple: Read what she writes. You will have a better life because of it.