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Need something for your kiddo’s trick-or-treating? Mandatory office Halloween soiree? First post-covid social engagement? Try one of these easy-to-assemble trail running Halloween costumes!
Basic Trail Bro: Don a Ciele hat, and rock some bright Goodr’s with a confusingly non-technical button-up shirt and jorts if you’re feeling spicy. BYOB – a super dank IPA (the hazier, the better) swaddled in a coozy you got in a race swag bag. You’re probably from Boulder. Or Flagstaff. (Portland variation: add a rain jacket and a slightly better beer.) Make sure to track your trick-or-treat excursion on Strava and don’t stop talking about your podcast.
The Courtney: Throw on a tee-shirt and your comfiest basketball shorts and BYO candy corn. Nachos optional.
The Ultra Ultra Runner: Grab your trekking poles, headlamp, gaiters, neck gaiter, waist-light, UPF hat with sunshade, taped-seam windbreaker, sunglasses, clear glasses, 12-liter vest, hip-belt, flasks, bladder, body glide, ramen noodles, gels, spare socks, spare shoes, space blanket, sunscreen, arm sleeves and wind pants. Though you may be dressed like you’re about to run the Marathon Des Sables, you could also just be out for a casual jog. You’re a human drop-bag: ready for anything.
The Crewmate: Same as above, but carry everything around in your arms the entire night and try to hand everybody you see quesadillas and Skratch.
The Emelie: Grab your S/O and dress entirely in S/Lab, or skimo suits with a babybjorn. Still be faster than everyone.
The Rookie Trail Racer: Grab some long shorts, a sleeveless Nike shirt, and blast the tunes in your Beats By Dre headphones (around your neck, so everyone can hear). Forget the hydration pack, just bring a good ol’ Gatorade bottle and be sure to ask everyone “How many miles is 25k????”.
The Harvey: Just circle your block 354.2 times while trick-or-treating
Sexy Minimalist Trail Runner: Just split shorts and a handheld. That’s it.
The Influencer: This costume is #Sponsored. Flip up the brim of your colorful hat, and snap a pic with your favorite beet-based energy bar or isolated cricket protein, preferably while gazing out at the ocean, or from a summit. Keep your phone and significant other at the ready for any potential photo ops. Bonus points if you have a cute dog who knows a TikTok dance. Make sure all product logos are visible at all times.
Sexy IPOS: Nothing but a gravel bike and KT tape.
The Media Mogul: POV: Your YouTube channel is just about to go viral. Grab your go-pro and lace up your trail runners, because you’re about to get a lot of B-roll. Wear a Sony TX90000 BD around your neck, and be sure to periodically change lenses for no particular reason. You’re a human steady-cam who’ll do anything to get the shot.
The Local Legend: To embody the low-key vibe of the frustratingly-fast unsponsored hometown hero, pull on a of worn-out trail runners and tattered shorts. Wait, is that a Team USA Shirt? Who is this runner? How many FKT’s do they have? OOOPS! Someone just stole your CR!